Tuesday, August 13, 2013
a work in progress
I'm that cliche person right now... Sitting in a coffee shop. Looking SOOOOOOO hip with my macbook. And even cooler because I'm actually drinking COFFEE. I've typed about 32 beginnings to this. You know how that goes. When you're "in the mood to write" but you sit down and nothing crosses your mind to put down. One sentence... backspace backspace backspace. "No, this is going on a blog... I certainly have to sound much cooler than I appear to be right now." You know, I'm sitting here and I can't write because I'm so concerned with what everyone else thinks I'm up to here. Do they think I'm a student? Or some poor legal secretary doing work after hours just to keep up with the pricks at the office who are always on my back? Or am I some brooding artist desperately trying to cultivate my "big break" piece?? If I could read minds... I'd NEVER GET ANYTHING DONE. Who am I really? It's so unimportant and pedestrian you'd cut me off mid sentence--"ok, I get it, you're average, at best. So is your job." You'd be right. I have somehow landed a job that pays me more than I'm worth, and essentially, I have NO idea what I'm doing. I can go through the motions and mechanically complete the work expected of me, but please don't ask me why I'm doing what I'm doing. More importantly... back to the coffeehouse people. Look at me, wonder what I'm doing. Wonder if I'm important. WISH YOU KNEW. Most of what everyone does on a day to day basis in the public eye is meticulously orchestrated in their minds to create an appearance far more important than the reality of it.